Your Biggest Fear In Your Early 20s

February 26, 2015March 3, 2015Leave a comment

We’ve been prepped for extraordinary lives.

Your commencement speaker told you anything was possible. So did your advisor, over coffee in your last few weeks of your undergraduate career. Great things are ahead, they said.

So after college, you move. You pick a new city. You settle into your first apartment. New place, new roommates. Find a new relationship. A new job. It sinks in: This is your life now. Your new, real life.

It’s supposed to be magical. It’s everything you’ve been working for. It falls short and just seems ordinary. Basic, even.

The years following college graduation are anticlimactic. We’ve put so much emphasis on the theoretical future, that we’re lost when it comes to the practical application. We’ve been training, like athletes looking ahead to the Olympics. We have our eyes on gold. A golden job opportunity, or finally being reunited with our significant other. As happens in the Olympics, not everyone wins gold.

We fear mediocrity.

Your life’s purpose up until this point has been preparatory. In middle school, you took accelerated math courses and sought the coveted spots in gifted and talented programs. You were pushed to read at a ninth grade level. The first two years of high school were about getting into the right AP courses and extracurriculars so that you’d be set for junior year, when you started looking for colleges. You applied, categorized, studied and vetted. You got in.

You went off to college. Four years preparing you for one of two things: graduate school, or real life. (Or both.)

College is over in a montage of tears, hugs and well wishes at graduation. You didn’t just spend 4 years preparing for your “real life.” You spent 22 years preparing. So it needs to culminate in something amazing. You’ve been given every opportunity, and now you’re going to put it to good use.

And that’s the problem with being given every opportunity. We are so fortunate to have gone to college, and thankful to our families, but there’s pressure that comes with being given the world. It’s a conditional gift. It’s waiting for you to do something with it.

And you’re scared you can’t. You’re scared you’ll fuck it up somehow. You’re scared that in your search for greatness, you’ll land at mediocre and settle.

These are the years when you question everything.

We start our first job, need more money, move to the next job. Do the entry-level thing. You love it. Or, no, that’s right, you actually wanted to kill yourself. Our mothers and fathers worked grueling office jobs so that we could pursue our dreams. Instead, we are beginning our pursuit of the same shitty office jobs and it feels wrong.

We start dating someone – or we graduate with our college or high school sweetheart by our side. Is this it? Now that we’re in real life mode, do we move in and get married?

We’re scared of calling it too soon. We’re scared to get comfortable in our relationship, because what if it’s not right? What if we’re just holding onto a relationship because it’s the only constant we have?

We can’t commit to a location. It may not be the right one for our career. Our soulmate may be waiting across the country and what if we pick the wrong place and never find the right person? We worry we’ll be stuck in our dead-end jobs 20 years from now. We are scared we’ll end up in a loveless marriage.

We’re scared our decisions will be set in stone.

They won’t. So right now, in the midst of all this confusion, you need to just make a decision. Stop complaining about your choices and start following through. Pick a city. Maybe the right guy isn’t waiting for you there, but the wrong guy is and maybe he’ll be more fun. If you’re trying to pick a job, stop griping and choose based on your instinct. If you don’t have the support of your parents or friends right away, trust that it will come. The worst that can happen is that your instincts fail you and you leave that job.

This uncertainty won’t last forever and your decisions are less permanent than you think they are. You aren’t a victim of your own choices unless you let yourself become one. Anything can change as long as you aren’t stagnant.

So look at your life in this moment and decide what you want to keep. Do you want to hold on to your relationship? Do you want to pursue the field you’re in? Purge your life of the things weighing you down. If you’re struggling with a choice, remember that you are only non-committal when you aren’t actually excited about what you’re committing to. Commitment is easier when you know it’s what you want.

As clichéd as it sounds, great things really are ahead. Maybe you’re going to accomplish all of your career goals, maybe you’ll realize you have none and will have to tear apart everything you’ve learned. Either way, there’s an amazing journey ahead.

Originally posted on Thought Catalog.

12 Texts Girls Send When They’re Trying To Friend Zone You

February 25, 2015March 3, 2015Leave a comment

1. The “Have a good night!” text.

People read this as flirty and think it opens the door up to a “sweet dreams baby”-type response. No. Wrong. She doesn’t want to dream about you. She’s politely trying to end the conversation. “Have a good night” does not mean she is going to sleep thinking about you. It’s a world away from “Good night ;).”

2. The “Work is crazy right now talk to you later” text.

There’s no apology, nor is there any punctuation. That’s because it’s a text sent from one friend to another. This isn’t an invitation for you to say, “oh no, bad week? I can come over and make it better.” Really, it’s just a text she sends when she has better things to do than respond to you.

3. The less-than-5-word text.

This is a strategic way to avoid blatantly ending the conversation. She doesn’t want to be rude so this exit is disguised as a participatory response.

Example: A guy tells a joke and the girl responds, “oh lol!” She’s not necessarily discouraging you, but she didn’t leave anywhere for the conversation to go. She’s hoping you stop responding first so she doesn’t have to.

4. The “Can’t talk now, I’m having a girls night” text.

This is a real thing. Sometimes girls like to gather and decide that “no boys allowed” includes anyone on the receiving end of their texts. To be honest though, if a lady’s really into you she’ll find a way around that rule or she’ll definitively say that she intends to text you back later.

5. The after the fact response.

Sample conversation:

Potential suitor: Hey, are you free this Friday? Maybe we could have a drink.
Girl (on Sunday): Sorry, this week totally got away from me! Did you have a good weekend?

6. The response that pushes for a group hang out.

If this happens to you, accept it: She’s not interested in you sexually. She really just likes you as a friend. So she strategically only invites you to things she knows will become group events. This is the text that reads, “Hey, I can’t do drinks on Friday but (insert mutual friend here) is having a party Saturday. You should come!” If she wanted to sleep with you, she’d be trying to see you one-on-one.

7. The “Hey, how’s everything going?” text, in response to you starting a conversation.

It seems like she’s interested in you when she’s receptive to your text. In reality, it only proves that you don’t bore her as a person. If a girl is into you, she’ll make it known by asking what you’re up to this weekend, etc.

8. The half-response text.

In which she engages only on the part of your text that’s safe to respond to. Sample conversation:

Guy: Hey, how’s your week going? Do you maybe want to grab a drink with me on Friday?
Girl: Mine’s great so far, how’s yours?

9. The text that evades setting an exact date and time.

When you ask if she’d like to get drinks sometime, it’s easier for her to say yes to some vague plans in the distant future. The initiator (understandably) takes that as a “yes” and then tries to set a specific time at which point the girl mysteriously “loses her iPhone” for a week.

10. The text that grossly overuses exclamation points.

When she’s flirting with you, she’ll use exclamation points sparingly. When she feels guilty that she isn’t interested, she’ll over compensate with 3+ exclamation points. Sample response: I have no idea what my schedule is like this week, life is soOOOooOo crazy!!!!

11. The text that deliberately classifies you as, “friend,” “bud” or “pal”

If she were actually into you, she’d be way too embarrassed to use nicknames. But she isn’t, so she’s calling you “friend” because she wants to JUST BE FRIENDS.

12. Radio silence

(Read: Not interested. BYE.)

Originally posted on Thought Catalog.

To Those Studying Abroad, Go Have Sex

February 24, 2015March 3, 2015Leave a comment

I didn’t move to Paris because it was something I’d dreamed about as a little girl. I went because I wouldn’t know anyone and I wanted to be surrounded by a language that wasn’t English. I had a small advantage – my family speaks fluent French – but mine is a shaky mess of jumbled pronouns and unconjugated verbs and bears traces of a Canadian accent.

I was reserved. Something about the harsh winter air and subdued Parisian personalities pushed me into my shell. I wanted to be daring, but it didn’t come naturally. Luckily, I fell into a good group of friends and felt more at home.

My closest friend began a flirtation with our professor. (It’s France, what did you expect?) I admired her boldness. I was too timid to approach any man in France – for fear of roofies and physical attention from anyone that wasn’t a boy I’d known for three years.

Finally, I became frustrated with my own self-censorship.

We went out on an uncharacteristically warm night, to a spot in the 10th arrondissment. It wasn’t a touristy area – no one was speaking English. I saw him almost immediately. He was tall, with a strong jawline and a smile that was familiar. (You know, when you see someone and their grin makes you feel like you’ve seen their face before?) He was pushing 30. I had just turned 20. Again, it’s France.

I wouldn’t approach him, or even move in his direction. In true middle school fashion, a friend physically pushed me into him. He caught me. I tried to emulate the pleasantly windswept look women pull off in movies, but was unsuccessful. I got out a “je m’excuse,” but before I could shuffle off, he coaxed my head upward and I couldn’t help it. I wanted to stay.

He came over a few days later, after a multitude of texts exchanged in broken English and grammatically incorrect French. I made friends go down to greet him and assess whether or not he might be a serial killer. He wasn’t. He was lovely. He brought wine.

I didn’t have wine glasses. I didn’t even have real furniture and I sure as fuck didn’t have a clue what I was doing with this beautiful man in my apartment. We talked and talked until I’d physically run out of things I could say in French (which surprisingly, took a few hours). When I’d run out of conversation topics, and figured I couldn’t keep my charm going much longer, I did what I’d want to do all along. I kissed him.

It escalated from there. Though not quickly, because in France you’re taught to savor not only your meals and your wine, but your sex too.

I don’t think I said much for the (insanely long) duration – there was truly no reason to interrupt him. What was I going to say? “T’as fini?”

If there was something I wanted to express, I didn’t need to do it verbally.

It is a very surreal experience to have sex in a language you don’t really speak, in a city that is not your own, with a man you don’t really know. But it was beautiful, in a way that nothing else in Paris was – which is saying something, because every inch of Paris is filled with beauty and I’d just like to publicly apologize to Monsieur Rodin, for the sacrilege of valuing this experience more than his museum.

I never saw my Frenchman again. It was just those two times – the night we met the night I had him over to my tiny studio in the 14th. I never reached out – I didn’t want to. Every romantic experience I’ve ever had came with baggage, but that night was perfect. I didn’t ever want to do anything to tarnish that memory.

The point to all of this isn’t that you should fly to Paris and jump the first garçon with a beard and skinny jeans. The point is that on any given day, you can have an experience you never thought you were capable of having. You can approach someone and make them fall for you. It’s an empowering thought – even if you don’t go home with them.

You don’t need sex to have a fulfilling study abroad – but you have to go experience something. Anything that elicits a feeling you’ve never had before. This is the one time in your life when you have no rules. Your financial concerns are minimal, you’re in good health and all the terrors of transition are muted because you know you’re going home in four months.

Stop shutting yourself out because you don’t speak the same language as everyone around you. Stop shying away from experiences you aren’t fearless enough to have. Don’t let your predispositions get in your way.

Get lost in Paris. Take a flight to Milan because it’s 9 Euros. Let an elderly Italian man teach you his language at a coffee shop, as you lean up against the coffee bar and drink your miniscule cappuccino. Go to a country you never thought you’d have any interest in and be amazed by its history.

Be braver. Beautiful things happen when you stop being scared of unfamiliar experiences.

Originally posted on Thought Catalog.

20 Affirmations For Those Who Have Ever Struggled With Mental or Physical Illness

January 21, 2015March 3, 2015Leave a comment

If you’ve fought a disease in the past or are currently fighting one, these affirmations are for you. They are also applicable if you’re constantly worried about your health, or are trying to practice a healthier lifestyle. Repeat them to yourself slowly, with deliberate breaths. Try to find your own rhythm. You can say them all in succession, or focus on repeating one that specifically speaks to your situation:

I love myself and I am perfectly healthy.
I always feel good. As a result, my body feels good and I radiate good feelings.
I treat my body as a temple. It is holy, it is clean and it is full of goodness.
I breathe deeply, exercise regularly and feed only good nutritious food to my body.
Healthy, wealthy and wise is my motto. My body is healthy, I am wealthy and my mind is wise.
I need not worry
God gave me a healthy body and in gratitude, I take good care of myself.
I always contribute in healthy ways to my body.
I AM living a long and healthy Life.
I eat healthy, nutritious and digestible food every day.
I drink large amounts of thirst quenching water every day.
I have a healthy spirit, mind and body.
I have a healthy heart and a strong set of lungs.
God has healed my body and in return, I will forever praise His name.
My strong body will fully recover and heal.
My health does not define my life. I live my life well in spite of my disease.
I have the strength to continue.
With every passing day, my body becomes stronger and more energetic.
I am thankful for the life I have been given.
I am full of vitality and I have a strong heart.

Originally posted on Thought Catalog.

25 Affirmations For Those Looking For Love and Happiness In All The Wrong Places

January 19, 2015January 21, 2015Leave a comment

It’s not for me to say if you’re looking happiness or love in the right places. If you feel like you aren’t, that’s probably a good indicator. Often we search in the wrong places when nothing is going according to plan. When the pieces aren’t falling in the way we hoped they’d fall, we search frantically for a path. Stop looking for happiness in everything you do not have. Instead, remember all of the blessings that you do have in your life. Realize how filled they are with love. Appreciate them. Express your gratitude and remind yourself how deserving you are of love with these affirmations

1. Thank you for everything, I have no complaints.

2. I feel an abundance of gratitude for everything I have and receive every day.

3. I am grateful for all the great health, love, and goodness that my life has revealed to me.
4. I am grateful for everything I experience in this lifetime. I overcome, I grow, and I prosper all the time. My abundant blessings, as well as my difficulties, all make me better, stronger, and more alive.
5. I appreciate everything I have and I show my sincerest gratitude to my loved ones.
6. I express my deep gratitude to God and everybody in my life. I am aware that I am incomplete without you all and thank you all for coming into my life.
7. I give gratitude for God’s endless treasures.
8. My needs and desires are generously met. For this I am thankful.
9. I clearly see the beauty of life that flourishes around me.
10. I give out love and it is returned to me multiplied many fold.
11. The partner I seek is also seeking me.
12. Every new day starts with happiness, is full of joy and ends with contentment.
13. Happiness is contagious. I spread happiness to others and absorb happiness from others.
14. Being rooted in my own happiness will help me find the one I will love.
15. I touch many lives. My happiness makes all these people happy, thus making it one big happy world.
16. I may already be impacting the life of my future partner.
17. I perform my random act of kindness regularly. Kindness breeds love.
18. Happiness is a journey, not a destination. God has blessed me with happiness and my journey is endless.
19. I do not have to feel joyful in every second to be happy.
20. I am grateful for each blessing in my life, and I will rid myself of resentment.
21. My faults do not define me, they are part of my journey.
22. My past relationships have no effect on my future relationships. They do not define me. They have no control over me.
23. I cannot change others, but I can improve myself and surround myself with the love I deserve.
24. I deserve love and I will receive it in abundance.
25. Happiness is a choice. I base my happiness on my own accomplishments and the blessings I’ve been given.

Do not feel guilty if you are repeating these words and you don’t feel like they are true. You are not the first person to feel that way, and you won’t be the last. Just keep repeating them, in the hopes that the idea will consume you and drive you to make the statement true.

“The mind and the body are like parallel universes. Anything that happens in the mental universe must leave tracks in the physical one.” — Deepak Chopra.

25 Affirmations For Those Who Struggle To Value Themselves

January 16, 2015January 21, 2015Leave a comment

Affirmations are meant to strength your confidence, lessen your anxiety, increase your gratitude and legitimately improve your health. The idea is to focus on what’s in your head and use it to your advantage. If you really are what you think, then you need to train yourself to think in the way that’s most beneficial to you.

This is especially true with our self-confidence. Our primary source of negativity and lack of confidence is ourselves. It’s internal. When left to our own thoughts, we start in on our vices and all of the ways we’re in adequate. And that’s when our confidence falters.

For the purpose of self-confidence, think of affirmations as a stabilizer – a way to root your thoughts in confidence and purge your negativity.

1. I approve of myself and love myself deeply and completely.

2. I am self-reliant, creative and persistent in whatever I do.

3. I am energetic and enthusiastic. Confidence is my second nature.

4. I face difficult situations with courage and conviction.

5. When I breathe, I inhale confidence and exhale timidity.

6. I always attract only the best of circumstances and the most positive people in my life.

7. I acknowledge my own self-worth.

8. Whether I have been valued in the past is irrelevant. I value myself in this moment and I will be valued in the future.

9. My body is healthy, my mind is brilliant, my soul is tranquil.

10. I release all ill feelings in me about people, incidents and anything else. I forgive everyone associated with me.

11. I have been given endless talents, which I will begin to utilize today.

12. Creative energy surges through me and leads me to new and brilliant ideas.

13. I am courageous and I stand up for myself.

14. Today, I abandon my old habits and take up new, more positive ones.

15. I am blessed with an incredible family and wonderful friends.

16. Though these times are difficult, they are only a short phase of life.

17. My life is just beginning.

18. I am at peace with all that has happened, is happening, and will happen.

19. My efforts are being supported by the universe, my dreams manifest into reality before my eyes.

20. I am the architect of my life; I build its foundation and choose its contents.

21. I possess the qualities needed to be extremely successful.

22. I am superior to negative thoughts and low actions.

23. I refuse to feel under valued by people around me.

24. I am worthy of all I have been given and I will give back.

25. Thank you for this moment, in which I am more confident than I was in the moment before.

Originally posted on Thought Catalog.

What Your Fast Food Go-To Says About You

January 10, 2015January 21, 2015Leave a comment

McDonalds:

You support the American dream. You put your heart into everything you do and believe that if you’re going to go for it, you ought to go all the way – which is why you order a Big Mac and fries. And it’s awesome.

Taco Bell:

You like weed and whimsical social media accounts. You are laid back and wear jeans to work. You like cheese. No, you REALLY like cheese. You may or may not have listened to this song on repeat in college.

Chipotle:

Your job is frustrating and you seek refuge in Chipotle because by lunchtime you’re famished from getting the soul sucked out of you. You’re sick of people telling you that’s there’s more authentic Mexican (or a taco truck) down the street, you just want them to leave you alone with your burrito bowl. You’re looking forward to the day when you’re financially stable enough to not think twice about asking for extra guac.

Moe’s:

Same as the Chipotle story, except there’s a Moe’s closer to you and after the day you’ve had you REALLY need queso. You also frequented Moe’s in college, and enjoy a nostalgic moment whenever someone says, “Welcome to Moe’s.”

Burger King:

This can go a few different ways:

1. You have a deep-seated childhood attachment to Burger King.
2. You don’t have any other fast food close to your campus that’s open at 2 a.m.
3. You enjoy buying the crowns for your friends ironically.

Shake Shack:

You have patience and a fervent need to explore anything you haven’t yet tried. You’re willing to wait in line because you have faith in the pay off. You believe in people and in the healing powers of milkshakes.

In-N-Out:

You’re on the west coast and whether you’re a transplant or not is irrelevant because a love for In-N-Out does not discriminate. You are unconventional in that you are down to mix different flavors to make unexpected combinations. You’re chasing your dreams. If you have a day job, you have passion projects on the side, which you pursue actively. You often think about In-N-Out even when you’re not there and you always ask for extra spread at the drive-thru window.

Waffle House:

You grew up in the south or went to school there and the Waffle House sign will forever be a random source of comfort. Whether you moved far away or stayed in the south, you have a genuine appreciation for sticking to your roots. You have strong convictions and own a Waffle House mug that you once stole 8+ years ago and still display prominently on your shelf.

Chick-Fil-A:

You’re an intense right-wing politico who firmly stands by Chick-Fil-A. Alternately, you strongly oppose Chick-Fil-A’s conservative, homophobic positions and desperately want to boycott them but your affinity for crispy chicken and waffle fries is too great. You’re a little indecisive, and are still trying to figure out exactly where you stand. You’ll get there, have another waffle fry.

Five Guys:

You’re the kind of person who loves the free samples at Trader Joe’s. You appreciate all the free toppings because they’re free and they attain a level of personalization that is rare in a sometimes anonymous world. You pay attention to detail, and are stickler for a good toasted hamburger bun.

Wendy’s:

You’re a night person and you absolutely detest waking up early. Your college class schedule never included an 8 a.m., or even a 9 a.m. class. You like to get what you want (not in a spoiled way, just in a way that if you want a baked potato at 1 a.m. you’re not going to talk yourself out of it.)

KFC:

You seek comfort and enjoy being enveloped in warmth, a feeling that can only come from mashed potatoes, gravy and fried chicken. Things are a little shaky, and you need something that you can count on, a friendly face. You found the Colonel.

Pizza Hut:

You’re actually 5 years old and your mom is bringing you to get pizza and wings before you go bowling. Should you even be reading this?

Quiznos:

After growing up in a family who exclusively went to Subway, one day you realized that Quiznos toasted their bread. You’re a pioneer, like Amelia Earhart. While you respect your family’s preferences, you seek something greater and are often restless until you find it. You also really like how Hannibul Burress says the word “Quiznos.”

Long John Silvers:

You’re confused. Much like Mr. Silvers, you might even be in the wrong industry. This chain may be the personification for anybad mistake you’ve ever made. It’s okay. We’ve all been there. Or maybe you just got back from study abroad and ran into the first American fast food chain you could find. Quench yourself with that greasy, oily food. Then go home and shower immediately to get the smell out of your hair.

A&W:

You long for a simpler time, when girls wore poodle skirts and boys took them to the sock hop. When everyone pulled up to the A&W, got their malted milkshakes delivered to their car and then sipped them on the way to the drive-in. You love random, quirky, fun things, like using their plastic telephones to call in your order from 10 feet away. You also appreciate supporting local businesses (years ago, all the A&W franchise owners bought out their parent company and now collectively own it.)

Originally posted on Thought Catalog.

15 Irrational Fears Everyone Has When They First Move To Los Angeles

January 8, 2015January 21, 2015Leave a comment

1. Your first celebrity sighting will be when you’re wearing no make-up, walking your laundry bin through Hollywood on the way home from Launderland.

What if you only get one chance to see Mindy Kahling? You don’t want to squander it. Take solace in the fact that Mindy’s a real person too, and she probably understands that you aren’t going to be on your game 100% of the time. (This is guess work, I don’t actually know Mindy Kahling.)

2. You’ll gain 20 pounds now that you’ve discovered the Neapolitan shake and animal style everything at In-N-Out.

You can’t just get animal fries without the burger. And once you discover that you can get all three milkshake flavors rolled into one, there’s no going back. Tie in the fact that In-N-Out will be on the short list of “affordable dining options” and you’ll start to build a lasting relationship with the drive-thru staff at the In-N-Out on Sunset.

3. You won’t be able to make rent because of all the parking tickets you’ve accumulated.

If you’re still on the tarmac at LAX, let me be the first to warn you: You’re going to get a lot of parking tickets in the next month. It will suck, but you’re in good company.

4. There will be an earthquake when you’re in a parking garage, or tall apartment complex, or anywhere.

If you’re from a place where earthquakes aren’t a concern, your first few months in LA will be filled with bosses explaining proper emergency earthquake procedures. A quick summary: if you’re in bed, stay there. If you’re at the office, hide under your desk. If you’re in a parking garage, panic.

5. The jargon you picked up from Clueless will no longer be relevant.

Just try as hard as you can to meet a sassy friend named Dionne and everything will be okay.

6. You’ll never find good Indian food again.

The best Indian food I’ve found in LA is in the Trader Joe’s frozen food aisle. Go try a ramen bar instead, you won’t be disappointed.

7. You’re going to be force-fed quinoa.

It’s avoidable. Really, it is. But before you vow to avoid it, remember that quinoa is fluffy, delicious and a great way to make a salad more filling.

8. You won’t be there when all of your friends see Lance Bass sing karaoke in the valley.

This happened to me during my first month in LA and it’s still tearin’ up my heart.

9. You’re going to start saying things like, “I’m juicing today,” and all your friends back home will judge you.

Everyone you meet in LA will have a different theory on how to juice, when to juice, etc. Embrace the hilarity. Personally, I’m of the opinion that juicing is only acceptable for one meal… and then I end up eating 20 minutes later. If you’d like to try a Kreation 3-day cleanse, do it up, but juice wisely.

10. You’ll get a ticket from J-Walking, just like they do on New Girl.

Your life will be cheaper if you use a crosswalk and wait for the walk signal. Trust me.

11. You’ll never see bagels at work, because everyone brings donuts instead.

Bid farewell to the sight of Dunkin Donuts bagels and coffee in conference rooms, and get used to the idea of seeing a donut shop on every block. Fear not though, there are great bagels in LA if you know where to look. (If you need some support or a recommendation, you can contact me through my author page.)

12. You won’t be tan enough.

Not everyone in LA is tan and blonde. However, if you’re concerned you’ll be too pasty, it’s beach season all year around. (Be warned, any LA native will be affronted that you’d go to the beach in January because they’ll tell you it’s too cold. It’s not.)

13. Time will move too fast because there aren’t seasons.

Without a weather transition every 3 months, how will we keep track of how quickly time is passing? This particular fear can get metaphysical pretty fast, so save yourself the internal struggle and buy a calendar.

14. You won’t make it to your first day of work, because you’ll get stuck in traffic.

Actually, this is a perfectly rational concern.

15. When you get fired, because you never made it to work because you were stuck in traffic, you’ll end up burnt out living in Venice Beach.

Would it really be so bad? Hula-hooping your days away sounds pretty great, if you ask me.

Originally published on Thought Catalog.

The Official Millennial Recap of 2014

January 1, 2015January 2, 2015Leave a comment

When we were kids, 2014 was just “the future.” An unexplained, far off time that would never actually come into existence.

And then it did.

And now it’s almost over.

A clean slate is right around the corner. As we wrap up our year and take inventory of memories and experiences, our excitement often wavers. For all that we’ve accomplished, there’s always a goal left unachieved. Or there’s a goal we achieved only to find it wasn’t what we wanted. (Or maybe you killed it this year, in which case, cheers to you.)

Regardless of which category you fall into, here’s proof that 2014 didn’t just pass us by. Turns out, a lot happened.

President Obama issued an executive order and appeared onBetween Two Ferns this year.

Among its new 2014 entries, the AP Stylebook added the words “buffalo wings” and “vegan.”

In 2014, Megan Trainer brought booty back, eight years after JT brought sexy back.

2014 is the year the CDC gave us an ineffective flu shot.

In October, we put our social lives on hold because Gilmore Girls came to Netflix.

The cronut celebrated its 1st birthday.

Bob Dylan turned 73. Britney Spears turned 33.

Brad and Angelina got married. Ryan Gosling became a father.

2014 is the year that Girl Scout cookie sales went online.

The Best Ad was Anna Kendrick’s Super Bowl commercial.

A petition to add a taco to the iPhone emoji list circulated.

Victoria’s Secret manufactured “I Woke Up Like This” panties.

Oregon, Alaska and the District of Columbia all legalized Marijuana for those over 21 in the 2014 midterms.

The Dems lost the Senate. The Palin family got into a bar fight.

We lost Robin Williams, Phillip Seymour Hoffman and 298 lives on Malaysia Airlines Flight #17.

Germany won the 2014 World Cup in Brazil.

This year, Whole Foods tried to sell collard greens as “the new kale.”

Everyone started 3D printing… everything.

In March, Ellen DeGeneres ordered pizza at the Oscar’s. Brad Pitt handed out the plates and napkins.

The first iPhone came out 7 years ago. 9/11 happened 13 years ago. The game “Bop-It!” was released 18 years ago and yes, you can still buy it on Amazon. The first episode of “Friends” aired 20 years ago.

What happened to you in 2014? This was the year I moved from upstate New York to Los Angeles. In true L.A. fashion, it was also the year I partied with Leo DiCaprio and Lukas Haas. (And contrary to the rumors, they were perfect gentlemen.)

My father learned the word “selfie” this year and my mother learned how to edit a Wikipedia page. My grandfather celebrated his 96th birthday.

What did you celebrate? What milestones appeared? What challenges did you encounter?

Maybe this wasn’t the year we figured it all out, but we learned something about ourselves, and something about the rest of the world.

Find light in 2014, whether you got your dream job, or got turned down for your dream job. Making it through is a triumph in itself. Celebrate the moments that shaped us and brought us here to the portal of 2015. Have your way with the coming year.

Originally published on Thought Catalog.